return to the clans

Sasha dreams of Tigerstar, but he never speaks to her. She raises her kits (Tadpole, Hawk, and Moth) in the woods, always fearing that Tigerstar might find them. But she doesn't want to leave either. She keeps her kits close to her and to their den. One day she runs into a ShadowClan patrol. Russetfur is in it and covers for Sasha by pretending not to know her. Later Russetfur comes to her den and asks if the kits are Tigerstar's. Sasha admits it and asks her not to tell him. Russetfur tells her Tigerstar is dead. Sasha has mixed feeling about the news.

One day her kits sneak out to Twoleg place looking for Ken. They know how much Sasha misses him and want to do something nice for her. While there they get trapped in an abandoned house. Sasha follows their scent, and with the help of another cat named Shnuky, who had seen the kits wandering around, finds them. While in the house an old pipe breaks and the house starts to flood. Sasha finds them and tries to save them but Tadpole drowns.

Broken, Sasha takes her kits back to their den. She dreams of Tigerstar again. And this time he speaks. She asks if Tadpole is with him. He says no, but he is safe. She runs into Pine one day who tells her all about the clan cats fighting BloodClan, and Sasha realizes he is describing Tigerstar's death. Realizing she needs help Pine takes her to a nearby farm to live with other cats, who he says are very nice. But once Pine leaves the other cats turn on Sasha and actually attack her kits. She attacks back in return and realizes they were really just all talk. She takes her kits away from and decides she needs to make a decision.

She tells her kits the good about Tigerstar and forbid them to ever tell another cat he is their father. Then she goes to RiverClan territory and waits for a patrol. She throws herself on their mercy and the clan takes her in, making her kits apprentices. Leopardstar offers repeatedly to make her a warrior but Sasha always tells her she is not ready. One day, between overhearing other apprentices pretending to kill Tigerstar and Leopardstar speaking of taking her to a Gathering, Sasha decides it is time to go. She takes her kits and tells them it is time to leave. They tell her they don't want to go and she realizes that so long as she is not around no one will know her children are Tigerstar's and they will be safe, so she leaves them.

I have to say this was by far the most depressing story ever. Between losing Ken, Tigerstar's treachery, living in constant fear of ShadowClan, losing Tadpole, and then giving her kits up Sasha's story is awful.

Yet, I can't help but feel all of this could have been avoided. Yes, hindsight is 20/20, but none of this needed to happen this way. She could have stayed with the captain, happy and cared for. She could have been more open with her kits about pretty much anything and everything. By keeping them in the dark about Ken, Tadpole died. And keeping them in the dark about Tigerstar after moving in with a clan was plain stupidity. She had to know they would find out the truth eventually. At least now I have my answer - Leopardstar never knew the truth about the kits, only Russetfur did.

And while I do understand some of Sasha's coldness now - it is pain - I don't understand all of it. And I don't understand Hawkfrost's comment to Mothwing about both of their parents only thinking of themselves. Everything Sasha did was to both try and protect her kits and give them the freedom of the world. However, maybe I am not being fair. Sasha's refusal to confide in her own kits could influence how Hawkfrost sees her.

One thing I am curious about is Sasha's dreams of Tigerstar - are they real? Tigerstar not walking with StarClan makes sense. Is Tadpole with StarClan now? Or is he somewhere else?

While this gives me a glimpse into her character - and Hawkfrost and Mothwing's - it mostly leaves me with more questions.